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| The Incider Crew “Take” The Directors’ Box! It was the first ever Incider crew Christmas party…so as y’know there was only one place to hold it! And fortunately, Incider reader Rose Jackson was able to play Santa and make our Christmas wish come true by generously putting her reputation on the line and inviting us to dinner in the Chairman’s Club at Ashton Gate before the Luton game. Spurred on by the prospect of a free bar well stocked with cider, RedTop flew back from the US, Edson managed to climb out from under his wife’s thumb long enough to give her the slip and drive down from Norfolk…and Tomarse managed to arrive an hour late from the outskirts of Bristol. Despite lowering their standards enough to actually let us in, the club’s dress code meant we were forced to ditch our jeans, City shirts and trainers and, y’know, spruce ourselves up a bit (though that might not necessarily be evident from the photos). Fortunately, the club recognised the exclusive Incider T-shirts as an emblem of class and quality, so these sought-after items of clothing survived the ban. Chairman Steve Lansdown and wife Maggie, City legend Paul Cheesley and chief executive Colin Sexstone were among those who risked widespread ridicule by sidling over in full view and saying hello to the rowdy bunch in the corner lowering the tone with their cheap Christmas hats.
RedTop – buoyed by cider and red wine - flashes his Incider T-shirt at the dinner table in the Chairman’s Club. Inexplicably, at this stage the coffee mints appear to have survived his appetite unscathed. A day already made special by the fact we didn’t have to pay for alcohol became even more unreal when we staggered through a cider-induced haze to seats in the front row of the directors box, immediately halving the average age in the Williams Stand and simultaneously sending the average bank balance of those in the directors box plummeting by about 95 per cent. Through infrequent breaks in the thick clouds of cigar smoke wafting gently across the directors’ box, we were able to catch glimpses of the action on the pitch as Thorpe and Co did their best to spoil our fun.
Proof that even when you’re sat in the front row of the directors’ box, there’s always a bloody great big bloke who plonks himself down in front of you and spoils the view… At half time, mince pies beckoned as we, y’know, shamelessly freeloaded and refuelled at the bar for the second half. Then misery as Luton took the lead against the run of play. For a moment, we thought about creating history by striking up the first chant of “Sack the board” ever to start from inside the directors’ box. Then it all changed. Disgracefully, someone had managed to sneak a horn into the box (something we couldn’t possibly condone in any way whatsoever) and when City appeared to have equalised we all went beserk with joy. That moment was short-lived as the ref ruled out the goal for offside. I can assure you that any traditional code of conduct in the directors’ box went out the window as those of us in the Incider crew got caught up in the emotion and left him in no doubt about the dubious nature of his decision or, indeed, his parentage. But the joy was back for real when Beadle fired home in the 94th minute. Even though it was two points dropped at home, it felt more like a victory as we went wild. I would now like to take this opportunity to apologize to the gentleman in his 50s sat next to me in the hand-stitched suit and genuine cashmere ankle-length jacket who looked shocked when I jumped up, hugged him with joy and shook him like a rag doll with pure relief, and send him the following message: For the record, I don’t actually want to have your children. After the match, the Incider team headed for the Centenary Club, where we discovered the beer was not free. After a brief moment of panic and an emergency mission to the Chairman’s Club to refill for nowt, we returned to cheer Scott Murray as he received the man of the match award from Paul Cheesley. RedTop then presented a special Incider award to Christian Roberts (as mentioned elsewhere in this edition). And there was one final bit of news which made our day complete as we were handed copies of the Green ‘Un…
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