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Carry On Doctor - The Lee Matthews Story

Now yours to own on video at last, this inaction-filled farce will have you rolling on the floor - after you fall off the sofa laughing and injure a metatarsal, rendering you incapacitated for six to eight weeks.

Lee Matthews may not have given the City faithful much to cheer in his short injury-filled time at Ashton Gate, but the laughs come thick and fast in this tale of a clumsy joker who can inflict long-term injuries upon himself in the most unlikely of circumstances.

Helpless Lee is under the care of saucy Nurse Holt, who is sure to get the pulses racing, the blood pressure rising and temperatures soaring! She's kept in check by the indomitable Matron Footman, who stands for no nonsense on the ward.

With Doctors Wilson and Lansdown in constant attendance you can bet the laughs are never far away, as they issue press releases claiming Lee is "only two weeks away from full match fitness", and "could do very well for us if he can get a run of injury-free games", only to have to retract the comments as Lee takes his eye out with a spoon he left in his cup of tea and then scolds his groin as he clutches his eye in agony before rolling along the corridors of Ashton Gate on an out-of-control tea trolley.

Yes, you'll be the one in stitches as this story of twinges, pulls, and tweaks unfolds before your eyes, and leaves you wondering why we ever bought such a crock in the first place. It's yours to own for just £100,000 - making every minute of use you get out of it suitably over-priced.

And to make Carry On Doctor a true Lee Matthews experience, we've recorded the film on a truly low-grade, flimsy video tape so that it too lasts only five minutes before getting knackered.

Yes, it's the film that has won mixed reviews:

"Distinctly average and over-rated." - Box Office magazine.

"Could do well if given a decent run. It's in my favourite 11 films." - Danny Wilson.

"I wish I'd never bought it. I'm trying to flog it second hand at a car boot sale but no-one will have it" - Steve Lansdown

"I split my sides laughing. It put me out of action for a month." - Lee Matthews.

* Look out for other titles in the series:

Carry On Claiming Your Pay Cheque - The Billy Mercer Story.

Carry On Up The M1 To Junction 10, You Can't Miss It - The Tony Thorpe Story.

Carry On Picking Burnell Ahead Of Hulbert Regardless Of Ability - The Danny Wilson Story.

Carry On Up The Khyber - The Bristol Rovers Story.


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