The World Will End in 17 Minutes

By our BCFC World correspondent Robin Fanz-Blind

Bristol City were facing a two point deduction last night after it emerged that the match against Wycombe finished in a shock 0-0 draw.

Stunned fans could have sworn they saw the Robins bury Wanderers with superb efforts by Mickey Bell, Scott Murray and Christian Roberts.

But the official BCFC World Console, which boasts up-to-the-minute “live updates”, insisted the game ended goalless – with the last enthralling action “a long goal kick taken by Steven Phillips” in the 17th minute.

As the final whistle blew, literally several City fans who paid £34.99 for PTV’s ball-by-ball coverage were disappointed to see the young guns had still not broken the deadlock.

Referee Peter Walton of Long Buckby, Northants, ruled the 0-0 scoreline had to stand after deciding the BCFC World result must be accurate.

He added: “I assume I was seeing things when I noticed the ball had gone into the back of the net because it would be unthinkable for fans to have to fork out so much cash for a “live console” which got scores wrong.

“It is reassuring that BCFC World is so accurate. So City fans will be delighted to learn I have agreed the 0-0 score stands.”

League chiefs were last night drawing short straws to decide who would have to break the news to Christian Roberts that his first goal in a red shirt was being disallowed.

One insider said: “It’s tough on the City lads because they played so well, but you can’t ignore the facts.

“The fact is that BCFC World had the score as 0-0 when the whistle blew, so we have amended the result.”

Despite the game ending in the 17th minute, the referee added an extraordinary 77 minutes of injury time, during which absolutely nothing of any note happened.

Among the goals that weren’t scored was a blinding volley from Mickey Bell, who didn’t open his account against his old club in the 38th minute.

That was followed up by a 51st minute effort from Scott Murray, who failed to finish superbly from a narrow angle.

Roberts wrapped up the non-scoring 21 minutes later, celebrating pointlessly afterwards.

Radio Bristol, the Evil Post and the Cistern Daily Press all launched inquiries after raising fans’ hopes by broadcasting the incorrect result.

BCFC World confirmed the final score was 0-0.

Spokesman Ivor Duff-Settup said: “There was absolutely no action whatsoever after the 17th minute.

“Any suggestion that three goals were scored and might have been missed is utterly inaccurate.

“If the BCFC World live console says the score was 0-0 after 90 minutes, then that must have been the case. Otherwise, why would we bother calling it a live console?”

The result plunged City dangerously close to the relegation zone.

Danny Wilson reacted angrily to the result and turned on the loyal City supporters, blaming them for creating such a poor atmosphere within the ground.

He said: “If the supporters had made a bit more noise, maybe the BCFC World people would have woken up and realized that the ball was in the net.”

Christian Roberts was last seen heading towards the BCFC World headquarters brandishing a sharp implement and muttering “You know, very disappointed. You know, thought I’d scored. You know.”

* In case you were among the 9,597 fans who managed to delude themselves at Ashton Gate instead of getting the real up-to-the-minute 0-0 result via BCFC World for a bargain £34.99, here is that official “live” BCFC World Console report of the action for you to enjoy and relive full:

Bristol City 0 vs 0 Wycombe Wanderers

0:07 – Attacking throw-in by Steve Brown (Wycombe)

0:21 - Sean Devine (Wycombe) caught offside. Free kick taken right-footed by Steven Phillips (Bristol City) from own half, passed.

0:41 - Foul by Paul McCarthy (Wycombe) on Christian Roberts (Bristol City). Paul McCarthy(Wycombe) booked for unsporting behaviour. Free kick crossed right-footed by Mickey Bell (Bristol City) from right wing, save (caught) by Frank Talia (Wycombe).

1:56 - Defending throw-in by Craig Woodman (Bristol City).

2:39 - Foul by Lee Peacock (Bristol City) on Paul McCarthy (Wycombe). Free kick taken right-footed by Frank Talia (Wycombe) from own half, resulting in open play.

3:16 - Inswinging corner from right by-line taken left-footed by Steve Brown (Wycombe) to near post, resulting in open play.

3:40 - Foul by Craig Faulconbridge (Wycombe) on Matthew Hill (Bristol City). Free kick taken right-footed by Steven Phillips (Bristol City) from own half, resulting in open play.

7:17 - Defending throw-in by Mickey Bell (Bristol City).

7:24 - Foul by Mark Rogers (Wycombe) on Lee Peacock (Bristol City). Free kick taken left-footed by Mickey Bell (Bristol City) from left wing, passed.

7:42 - Attacking throw-in by Christian Roberts (Bristol City).

7:56 - Cross by Christian Roberts (Bristol City), clearance by Mark Rogers (Wycombe).

8:02 - Shot by Scott Murray (Bristol City) drilled right-footed from right side of penalty area (6 yards), over the bar.

8:22 - Goal kick taken long by Frank Talia (Wycombe).

8:32 - Defending throw-in by Craig Woodman (Bristol City).

8:45 - Foul by Chris Vinnicombe (Wycombe) on Lee Peacock (Bristol City). Free kick taken right-footed by Steven Phillips (Bristol City) from own half, resulting in open play.

9:27 - Attacking throw-in by Clayton Fortune (Bristol City).

9:37 - Attacking throw-in by Clayton Fortune (Bristol City).

10:06 - Goal kick taken long by Frank Talia (Wycombe).

10:52 - Cross by Danny Senda (Wycombe), header by Darren Currie (Wycombe) from centre of penalty area (18 yards), save (caught) by Steven Phillips (Bristol City).

12:09 - Foul by Keith Ryan (Wycombe) on Christian Roberts (Bristol City). Free kick taken left-footed by Craig Woodman (Bristol City) from own half, passed.

12:49 - Attacking throw-in by Craig Woodman (Bristol City).

12:59 - Defending throw-in by Chris Vinnicombe (Wycombe).

13:31 - Lee Peacock (Bristol City) caught offside. Free kick taken right-footed by Chris Vinnicombe (Wycombe) from own half, passed.

13:47 - Goal kick taken long by Steven Phillips (Bristol City).

16:09 - Attacking throw-in by Danny Senda (Wycombe).

16:18 - Goal kick taken long by Steven Phillips (Bristol City).

Er…Full Time, apparently.