Now exclusively on offer from The Incider, it’s the gift every Gashead should have.

Yes, for the princely sum of £49.99 you too can own the ultimate in non-league chic – your very own Bristol Rovers Conference Kit.

This must-have item contains everything the diehard supporter of a non-league minnow needs to follow his team as they battle it out on muddy fields across the country.

And let’s face it, you must be a diehard not to call it a day and switch allegiance now the Gas are heading down and out.

Our kit includes:

• HIGH-POWERED BINOCULARS – To spot other supporters.
• LOUDHAILER – To make it sound like there’s a crowd.
• UMBRELLA – You don’t actually think they have covered stands, do you?
• WELLIES – Concrete terracing, what’s that?
• A CALENDAR - With October 25th 2003 circled in red. Yes, that’s the date your FA Cup campaign will start (and probably finish) next season.
• A CARDBOARD CUT-OUT OF THE F.A. TROPHY – Your new competition.
• A MAP - So you can find your way to exciting venues like Nuneaton, Gravesend and Margate. Hell, we’ve even marked Accrington Stanley’s ground for you.
• A MAGNIFYING GLASS – So you can spot your results in the newspaper.

The Conference Kit comes exclusively in blue and white and will be on sale from May 3, ready for you to pick up straight after defeat against Kidderminster.

But call quickly and we’ll double your order so you can give a Conference kit to your friend, if you have one.

That means the entire Gas away following for the coming season can be fully equipped for just £99.98.

And we’ll even throw in a free Mickey Mouse, so you can always keep a reminder of your club with you wherever you go.

To avoid disappointment (for a change) don’t delay. Demand for the Conference Kit is bound to be so low that we could go bankrupt any minute (sound familiar?) And if you miss out, you’ll kick yourself.*

Our kit is designed to last a lifetime, so it will stay with you throughout your team’s stay in the Conference. Then, simply replace it with our Dr Martens League Kit.

So send off your cheque or postal order for £49.99 made out to The Grey Graydon Escape Fund today. It’ll be better value than a Gas season ticket for next year. Guaranteed.

* Warning: Don’t try this if you’re a Bristol Rovers player – you’ll probably miss.