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Occasional scorer of thirty yard screamers, Mickey has opted for the same haircut for five seasons now. However, fans were recently shocked to see Mickey’s traditional centrally parted pudding bowl had made way for a more up-to-date spiky look. It transpires that this is not what Mickey’s mum told him to have, and the old look should be back with us as soon as this one has grown out a bit. Mickey has played alongside Brian Tinnion on the left for several seasons now, and the pair have built up an almost telepathic rapport. City fans have become used to the sight of Mickey knocking a short pass to Tins and continuing his run up the left, only to point at the ground in front of him with flat, up-turned palms as the ball sails harmlessly into the Dolman. It's an understanding that has developed through years of dedication to the art of the misplaced pass. Mickey has recently been transfer-listed by City, in what has been widely reported as an attempt to clear the wage bill and bring in funds for fresh signings. A recent accusation that the only reason he was listed was to prevent him becoming a City legend who future generations of fans would want remembered in the traditional way, by naming an end of the ground after him, have been hotly denied by the club. One Gate source told The Incider: "John Laycock voiced concerns over the prospect of a Bell End at Ashton Gate. What a shame he didn't have this attitude prior to the appointment of Tony Pulis." Ever aware of the potential for puns his surname possesses, Mickey is rumoured to have winced when Danny revealed he wanted to make A. Brown Bell's long-term partner on the left. However, Mickey also gives fans the chance to demonstrate their grasp of the blindingly obvious with the lyrical masterpiece: "We've got Mickey Bell. We've got Mickey Bell. We've got Mickey. We've got Mickey. We've got Mickey Bell." Likely Evening Post headline: ‘Mickey hits a Bellter’. Unlikely Evening Post headline: 'First Division Club Take Mickey Out Of City'. |
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